To Lose Weight, One Must Fall Out of Love with Food - An Essay by Dr. Jeffrey Fossati
For as long as I can remember, I have always been fat. My first recollection was about age 7 when my mother referred to me as "husky" when sizing for jeans. I was not quite sure what this meant as the dog next door to us was a Siberian Husky, and I had no body hair nor liked to hump a leg.
I was big. Food at that time was neither a friend nor an enemy to me. I liked to eat, and food was readily available. In grammar school, I was teased about my weight, my last name is Fossati, and it was changed to FAT-ssoti by those who made fun of me. I would have been called "large-boned" by many, and for my age, I was quite strong.
There are at least two occasions where I was wrestling with older boys which resulted in their fractured clavicles. After inflicting these injuries, I don't recall being yelled at by my parents or the parents of the victims of my weight. I do remember being told to no longer play rough with the boys. I do remember a sense of strength that was attributed to my size that I liked. I liked being big; I felt older, I felt stronger, I felt jollier, and at that age, there were no incentives to lose weight.
The big problem many people have with losing weight is that there are no incentives to lose. I know that many people state that they need to lose weight to feel healthy, attract a mate, to be healthy. This need, it seems to me, is not strong enough for most people to take the next step.
In our society, the mantra is "that if anything bad is to happen, it will happen to the other guy ." People state that they have time to lose weight in the future. Therefore, there are no worries about losing weight for now. People feel comfortable in their skin, even if that skin is stretched to aneurysmal proportions.
In order to truly lose weight, one must fall out of love with food.
In order to truly lose weight, one must fall out of love with food. What do I mean by this? I don't mean to say not to eat when you are hungry; that is a given. I speak to those who can not resist a Girl Scout Samoa cookie, Grandma's pasta, or a Burger King Whopper. If these foods are eaten when not hungry, whether full or between meals, the only speculation is that the eater has a love of the taste of food.
The old adage that those who try to lose weight have no willpower is correct. People in love with others cannot resist loving their spouse, child, or parent. The love people have for food is also a powerful love. You must treat food as if it were a lover who scorned you. Shun it. Put in your mind that you, from now on, will only use your ex-lover for your satisfaction and dump them when no longer hungry.
Click for More Walking Information:
A recent documentary on a woman who suffered from obesity her whole life opened my eyes to this. In the documentary, the main part of the show was presented with pictures of the woman from an early age and her narration. The earliest photos were of her as a baby, a rather large baby, and her description of how food was readily available to her growing up. Later pictures in the toddler stages showed that her love of food blossomed. Even late childhood pictures showed an even larger child.
It wasn't until her mid-teens that she mentioned that she started dieting, particularly associated with the onset of puberty and attraction to boys. She stated, in her narration, that she could not lose weight with whatever diet she tried. She mentioned the standards; Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, Nutrisystem, etc. By her early twenties, her weight had become critical, over 100 pounds overweight with breathing and joint problems. Photos presented in the documentary at that point, with her narration in the background, depicted a severely overweight person in dire straights.
In her late twenties and early thirties, she decided to have abdominal intestinal surgery, which had become popular in the late '90s and early 2000s. Post-surgery, she began to lose weight rapidly, with photos and narration to support this. Breathing, Joint, and even Hypertension problems disappeared. Additional photos of an even thinner woman were shown.
Then they showed her live, at the time of taping of the documentary, and there before us was a thin, cachectic woman who appeared to be skin and bones. At that point, because of the surgery, she was essentially starving to death, unable to take in enough calories to support her life. The premise of the documentary was to say how bad this surgery was and how the surgery was slowly killing this woman.
This documentary confirmed to me that when that woman, in her mid-teens and early twenties, tried to diet and failed, it was because she cheated on her diet. After her surgery, when she was physically incapable of eating, she lost weight. She had not fallen out of love with food; she needed a divorce from food.
What is the best way to fall out of love with food?
The first thing is to realize that there is a problem in your relationship. You think too much about food, you have given in to your temptations on too many occasions, and you get more upset with yourself as you know you know you are a better person.
To start, you must decide that food is no longer going to rule your life. You must make a definite decision! Any bit of doubt in your mind is enough for you to fall back into the relationship! You must be sure you are through with food.
Once you make this decision, then what? Logically the first thing to do is start. It is always good to pick a day to start to become mentally ready to have a life "out of love" with food. Start with eating something plain for breakfast, a banana, oatmeal, or something small but filling. I have started by eating a banana with some peanut butter. Nutritionists have stated that bananas and peanut butter are great fat burners and that the extra fiber and protein will assist in getting food through your gut.
The key is to eat every 2-3 hours, but only if you start feeling hungry. It is too late if you get to the point where you are starving. Bring a bag with apples, oranges, and raisins with you to work.
If the food did not come out of the ground or off a tree the way you put it into your mouth, you can not eat it. A cheeseburger did not grow from a tree; therefore, you can not eat it.
A good snack is also a hand full of almonds. For lunch and dinner, try having some grilled chicken with vegetables or a salad with tuna or sardines. These are very filling and are minimally low in calories.
In addition to eating less, you must exercise. I don't mean going to a gym and exercising for hours per day, just get out and walk, start at 15 minutes per day and increase over time. Offer to walk the neighbor's dog. Walk up the five flights of stairs to work rather than take the elevator.
You will be surprised that just a small amount of effort will provide such a benefit in just a few weeks. When your old lover food comes around and temps you, you have to ask yourself, 'is it worth letting them back into my life?' When you lose weight, your mantra should be "nothing tastes as good as thin feels."
Support groups or support "people" are extremely important in the weight loss process. You need someone in your corner to keep you on the straight and narrow. A large group is not necessary, just a few key people should do the job. Let them know about your intentions to lose weight and instruct them to assist you in times of need.
Jeffrey Fossati, MD
Medical Director, Northern New Jersey Pain and Rehab
Dr. Fossati is board certified in Physical Medicine & Rehabilitation and Electrodiagnostic Medicine. He is a Clinical Assistant Professor at New Jersey Medical School administrative faculty for the Department of Physical Medicine and Rehabilitation. Dr. Fossati’s training is from New Jersey Medical School and he completed his residency at the “famed” Kessler Institute for Rehabilitation/UMDNJ. Dr. Fossati is a specialist in the diagnosis of all injuries and pain related syndromes and also specializes in joint and trigger point injections, as well as, nerve conduction studies and electrodiagnostic investigation (EMG).
Join our email list and get our Exclusive Get Out the Door Checklist and Walking Inspiration, our quarterly walking information newsletter
